Recently, I was talking with a friend. I thought it was going to be a quick conversation. The water cooler kind. I thought we might touch the surface of the problem, but then brush it off and move to the next task at hand. I was wrong.
Instead, it turned into a moment of full disclosure. The raw, heartfelt kind. As I listened to my friend go on about their issue, I felt like I was on the other side of a glass wall just watching the events unfold. It was heartbreaking, but not because of the story being told. It was heartbreaking because of the way they were telling it. My friend was clearly listening to their monkey and was fully absorbed by it.
You know about your Monkey, right? Your monkey is the little voice that comes out when things get tough. It sits there on your shoulder and starts whispering in your ear. Your monkey doesn’t whisper “sweet nothings”. No, your Monkey feeds you lines of garbage. Things like “You were a fool to do that.” “What are you thinking?” “You’ll never be able to succeed.” “People will laugh at you.” The feelings that follow your Monkey’s sermon are really where you’ll start to spiral. Your Monkey brings insecurity, doubt, self-hate, depression. I know I’ve fallen victim to my Monkey. I know that you have too. We all must battle our little bastard Monkeys on occasion so that our Angels can sing.
After listening to my friend tell their story, dancing on a ledge between tears of grief, full blown anger, and denial, all I could say was “bull*%!$”.
Now, I didn’t mean for it to come out so abruptly. I meant it with my most honest intentions. In the blink of an eye, my Better Angel threw the entire conversation off balance. Looking back, it was probably the best thing that could have happened. The last thing my friend needed was coddling or someone to make them feel better. What my friend needed in that moment was someone to wake them up to the reality they couldn’t see.
I have known my friend for many years and have seen their better side. The side that is strong, smart, fearless, loving, and knows how to be a leader. But their little bastard Monkey was clouding their vision, and had been for a while.
My Better Angel knew that. Without thinking, my Angel put it all out on the table. It was a confident gesture of love and understanding. It wasn’t arrogant. And I wasn’t agreeing with all the bad things going on. While those terrible thoughts might have felt real to my friend, they needed someone to wake them up from the daze. A simple hand up to get back on the right path. My Angel knew that instinctively, and immediately you could see the change start to happen.
We can all get trapped by our Monkeys. Maybe it’s uncertainty as the world moves faster, frustration with a loved one, lacking confidence in a job, depression from your own struggles, fear of losing someone, or anxiety of not being good enough. I have been there. And, so have you.
If you’re at a point in your life where you aren’t sure which direction to go, try to figure out which voice is your Monkey and which is your Angel. When it is uncertainty about whether you should buy or sell, or take over the world, or run and hide… maybe we can help. Our business is selling real estate, but it’s really about making sure your future is in order. Sometimes, you just need help tuning out the noise.
If you’re having trouble putting a muzzle on your little bastard Monkey, then give us a call. The market is what the market is. Buying. Selling. Investing. Stop just reading headlines and stumbling around in the dark. It’s always a good time when you know what to look for. Knowing the real facts and helping people make informed decisions is something we have been doing for our clients for the last 15 years. We can help you too.
Today, you should plan for tomorrow. Call us at (206) 466-4020 or info@hudsoncreg.com.
Cheers!
Jen Hudson
P.S. This post is inspired by one of my favorite real estate instructors, Joe Still, CCIM.
P.P.S. I really do like Monkeys, but the furry kinds not the ones noted here.